Tariq Nelson

KFC…the root of all conspiracies against the Muslims

How many spies are watching you at all times?

a) 2-3

b) 25-30

c) The entire NSA, plus two satellites are assigned to me and Bush gets daily updates of my movements

How many spies are there in the world?

a) 300 million

b) 400 million

c) There are actually 12 billion people on earth and not 6 billion. The other 6 billion unaccounted for people are the spies!

How many weekly trips to KFC do you make to try to catch spies?

a) Once a week, too many other restaurants to cover

b) 2-3 times a week

c) Everyday during lunch, and boy have a I caught a lot of them red handed, greasy fingered and acting like it tasted good

If a Jew is traveling from California at 55 MPH and another Jew is traveling from Maine at 65MPH, how long before they control the world?

a) About 15 minutes

b) Depends on if they are eating cookies made with Palestinian blood

c) Which world are we talking about here BROTHER?!

What time do all the whites come to the black community and litter the streets?

a) 8:00AM when everyone is asleep

b) There are actually 25 hours in a day and they come at 13:00PM

c) I can’t find them …those sneaky jokers are using cloaking devices!

How much do spies get paid?

a) Thousands!

b) Billions!

c) Even MORE…MILLIONS!

Finish the following sentences:

Bruce Lee is …

a) a person spying on me that looks just like the Kung Fu dude

b) a code name for a plot against me

c) … not dead, but frozen in carbonite under Chatsworth and they’re gonna melt him down as soon as the economy gets better

Yusuf Smith, Amir Butler and Tariq Nelson are …

a) all members of the Illuminati. Codenames: “Hammer”, “Slammer” and “Flyguy”

a) Cheney, Bush and Nino Brown

c) The Sith Lords Darth Fitnah, Darth Verilous and Darth Calamitous and all carry those red lightsabers developed by the Pentagon

Fluoridated water is …

a) contains microscopic brainwashing chips to turn people into spies

b) destroys the microscopic brainwashing chips consumed when eating KFC

c) contains microscopic hearing devices

Are your socks the exact same pair you put on this morning? How can you be sure that no-one’s replaced them with a different but similar pair at some point?

a) Not at all sure, now that you mention it!!!!

b) How do you know I’m wearing socks BROTHER?!!

c) I don’t wear cotton socks as they’re part of a government plot to get you to wipe over them. Spies and those fooled by the gov’t wear cotton. I wear leather socks which can’t be secretly replaced

The media is

a) a hive minded monolith controlled by the Jews

b) has outposts on seven continents and the nineteen planets of the solar system

c) Hmmm, both a and b …because we know that there are nineteen planets in the solar system each with a spy base

Are WE in the Matrix??

a) Hmmm, I’ve never thought of that one! Better give it some thought and if we are how I can get out of here

b) Yes, YOU are!

c) The Matrix is a Jewish plot

Just how noble are you?

a) Me, my takfeeri friends and the terrorist bandits we support are the only noble people on earth. Light shines off our our faces from our nobility

b) It’s A)

c) All of the above